Al Jazeera, Falafel Cart Owner, Releases Tape of Son’s Birthday

Appears to Show Al Qaeda Training Camp for Toddlers

Brooklyn, NY—Over the weekend Park Slope falafel cart owner Albert “Al” Jazeera released a 40-minute tape of his son’s 6th birthday party to news organizations around the world. The tape is one of a series of tapes released by Al Jazeera in past months which have chilled the world with scenes of Muslim weddings, office picnics, and family nights in front of the television. CIA analyst Fiona Pinkwater has watched the most recent tape dozens of times and says it appears to show the training ground for a cell of child Islamic terrorists training somewhere in the New York area. “On the tape you can clearly see them playing “Pin the Tail on the Infidel Donkey” and what appears to be “Suicide Bombers and Indians,” she says. “In one scene a child, codename “Chip,” blows out six candles, a symbolic act of snuffing out the flames of freedom. This type of indoctrination is insidious.” Jazeera says he will release more tapes, and warns that the footage of Muslims dancing from the upcoming Falafelman’s Ball will make the world quake with fear.